Promise

I made a promise to myself sitting at the edge of this rocky path which led to the ocean and I failed.

My life for the past 3 years has been mostly about work. I have dedicated myself to it because it gives me a reason to live, I learn and working makes me feel good. But like I said, there was this rocky path and I was sitting at the edge and I looked at the vastness in front of me. The water and sky eventually merging somewhere far.

Now you must be wondering what promise? I will tell you but come along and read it. Looking at that vastness and emptiness makes you think and reflect on life and mostly in a positive sense (or it depends). So, I sat there thinking for a long time about almost everything, my relationships with people, my way of looking at life and things that needs work.

I made a promise that I will look at life with a different lens. I would never leave or abandon my passion(s) and would certainly improve my perspective towards life. Then two days later I found myself back in my usual routine with my job and I started forgetting everything. To preserve the memory, I’d close my eyes and try and remember the waves hitting the rocks, vast blue sky and obviously the water.

That also went away, I wasn’t seeing those waves and I forgot my promise. But yet here I am on my birthday making another promise that I will act on it. I will not let myself lose in the rush of this life. In the fast moving cars and the metro. I will find my balance and I will do things my way.

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Have you had such encounters with yourself? I’d love to hear about them.

Lean back

You are sitting on the chair in your office questioning your existence and choices you’ve made. Little decisions that shape up your life and you realize that while trying to make things perfect you are only getting far from it. Anyway, that’s not what I intend to write today. See this is not me telling you about my job or life or if I hate it not. It is not that.

Before I take a random turn and start talking about something else, let me tell you what made me write this. I plugged in my headphones and opened Wynk app and put the music on shuffle. Then with a deep breathe I leaned back and stared upwards and closed my eyes (I did that again). Then following my habit, I looked around at my beloved colleagues some nah almost all of them busy staring at the screens which would have excel, word or LinkedIn open. And then I look at myself doing the same thing, losing that sense of freedom and burying myself in the work.

To be honest, I love working and achieving things and being busy has its own benefits. What bothers me at times is the fact that I am letting my other side go too far. You must wonder what is this other side I am talking about. I shall tell you on some fine day.

Until next time. I hope you will look forward to the next post.